BITTERSWEET

As I write this, I am currently at my grandparents’ house in Baltimore City. We are going through my grandparents’ old stuff at my grandmother’s and deceased grandfather’s house. It is kinda cool to go through old stuff I remember as a kid, sure, but it is also kind of sad. I took some books and a Celtic Cross that belonged to my grandfather. One book I remember very distinctly is called MYSTERIES OF THE UNEXPLAINED. I was kind of a weird kid, so I always found that book fascinating. I took it as a memento to my youth. Rest in Peace, weird childhood! But I also found some old books on Irish fairytales and culture. I also took a very old music box in the shape of a clown that, honestly, looks like it might be possessed by Satan. But it is a beautiful piece of artwork and very vintage. Who knows? Maybe it’s valuable. If not monetary value, it has sentimental value and that’s worth more than money to me. My grandmother wants everything out since the rest of my family is frankly kinda concerned about my grandmother’s well-being. My grandmother lives by herself in a three level house. She actually fell outside walking the dog the other day and was unable to get up, so yeah…kind of scary. My grandmother is 90 years old and lives by herself, so yeah…pretty nerve-wracking. But going back to my original premise, it is pretty cool going through old stuff and going, “Oh yeah! I remember this!” My sister got an old VHS cassette video camcorder that my grandfather used to use all the time and we were going through some old videos. I am kind of hoping Caroline decides to preserve those tapes because it gives me and the family an opportunity to see my grandfather with us as kids over and over again. It makes me sort of sentimental seeing all this stuff and reminiscing about it. But it is sorta cool to have something that used to belong to my grandfather that I can hopefully pass along to my kids and so on and so on. I got my grandfather’s old Sony digital camera, so that’s pretty cool, seeing as I needed one. But I do feel a slight sense of dread and guilt “raiding” my grandmother’s house, even if she is ok with it. I have a feeling she wants it out to stop reminding her of her late husband. But why I feel dread is because I know she’s probably next in line…God forbid. So that makes me kind of sad thinking about it. But I should get off that subject before I work myself up… I love going through old stuff for nostalgia purposes. Even if it is “junk” and “worthless” it is still pretty cool to see. I found some books that are probably as old as my grandmother and the pages are crumbling. So yeah…probably not worth much in their condition but still pretty cool to see. My sister Abbey found a textbook from when my grandmother was studying nursing at Drexel in the 50’s so that was super neat to see and compare to modern medicine and treatments.

So that’s it from me. I want to hear from you guys. Do you like reminiscing by going through family heirlooms or anything like that? Thanks for reading!

-Tom

 

Author: AuTom Spectrum Blog

I have Autism and am a self-advocate and public speaker. On the side I do stand-up comedy. I live in Baltimore County and have an AMAZING girlfriend

One thought on “BITTERSWEET”

  1. I remember going through my Nana’s house which made me sad but happy at the same time. We have a lot of her stuff in our house. The things we have bring back a lot of good memories. We have a lot of pictures which make me happy so I know that I will not forget what she looked like. I think she was there the day we were in my aunt and uncles RV since her scent was there which was a floral scent. We also went through my Bubby’s house and my other Aunt and Uncle’s house. It’s bittersweet because I know my uncle is probably not going to be here much longer. I dread the day it happens since I am so close to my uncle. I am grateful for the reminders of my family I have. I have the big bear from my Uncle Sol and my Aunt Penny. I sleep with it every night. I am grateful to have the best and the pictures since they both passed away. I miss them more then words can ever describe. I would do anything to have one more hug and be able to tell my Uncle Sol how much I love him.

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